Individual Consent, Inclusivity
& Accountability Practices
At Southwest Love Fest (SWLF) events, we support and maintain consent-focused, sex-positive, and power-aware exploration of relationships, sex, & intimacy. This creates a shared framework of consent, inclusivity and accountability to be held by everyone at our events. Everything listed here is meant to be embraced and maintained by you.
Inclusivity
To ensure everyone feels welcome and as safe as possible at SWLF, I make sure to...
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Educate myself on microaggressions and differences of privilege.
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Make sure everyone's voices are heard, especially marginalized voices.
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Respect individual's bathroom choices regardless of gender identity and presentation.
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Respect pronouns. If I am unsure, I will ask their pronouns or use “they/them” instead of defaulting to “he/she” or “him/her”.
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Educate myself on ableism including downplaying or dismissing invisible disabilities.
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Educate myself on fat liberation and abstain from fat phobia.
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Consent
Consent is...
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A clear yes, not the absence of no.
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An act of free will based on choice.
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An active response, not passive. Silence and passivity do not equal consent.
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Possible only when there is equal power.
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Consent is NOT...
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Pressuring someone into changing their mind.
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Giving in because of fear.
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Giving in or going along with someone to gain approval, or to avoid being hurt.
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Additionally...
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Consent to one event or action does not imply consent to another.
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Consent to an event in the past does not imply consent to the same event in the present.
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Consent can be withdrawn at any time.
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Consent CANNOT be given if an individual:
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is under the age of 18.
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is incapacitated due to alcohol or other drugs.
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is unconscious or asleep.
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is unable to understand what is going on.
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is coerced, intimidated, forced or threatened with force.
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Our consent framework is based off of the work of William Winters & Misha Bonaventura of Bonobo Tribe, you can find their open source Consent & Accountability policy here
Accountability
Southwest Love Fest seeks accountability and repair first as possible. Using the above consent framework makes a safer and more enjoyable conference for all. You should be under the assumption that you are accountable for all of your actions, even unintended ones. As we all make mistakes and do harm, whether intentional or not, accountability is how we learn to be better community members and repair harm with one another.
Feedback is the greatest asset for someone being alerted to any harm they may have caused. If you or surrounding community members have the willingness & capacity, let the person know directly what was harmful.
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An easy recipe for repair is:
"I'm sorry for [state harm as told to you]. Thank you for letting me know. Is there anything you need from me around this?"
Avoid any justification or explanation of why you might not have known or what you thought, you may end up having an insincere apology or create further harm.
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Educate yourself further on anything unclear to you why it was harmful with web resources, paid consultations or for free with knowledgeable privileged folks. Please do NOT ask marginalized people for free labor for your education.
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If you or another person need conference assistance, alert any conference staff/volunteer person to the situation. We will help as much as we are able and have capacity and/or training on.
Conference staff will investigate reported incidents and take appropriate action on a case-by-case basis. All actions taken by Conference Staff will be reported to all individuals involved.
Ways you may be held accountable in the community are:
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Feedback or coaching with the intent of helping me be a better community participant.
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Participating in mediation or restorative justice.
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Being asked to leave the event, up to and including, being temporarily or permanently banned from future or related events.
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Allowing SWLF to share any information about the incident and involved parties with other organizers or community members, however they decide is best, in order to help prevent future issues.
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